The trailer for “Abigail” provides you with almost all the information that you are likely to be interested in about this wacky concept of a horror thriller about kidnappers who go down the slippery slope when they try and take in a child vampire of a ballerina character and fail. Alisha Weir is quite delightful in the bratty vampire role but she only exhibits her petulance when attacking or hunting her victims.
Fans of the genre will also recognize some cast members in the ensemble who chew every scene and piece of dialogue handed to them, not too lightly. There is swearing (a lot, so as to make it believable that they are trying to compensate for something); there is running (from one to another mostly); there is picking them off one by one.
If you have come in to watch “Abigail” with the intention looking forward to going through the numbers with plummy character actor capers from Those Guys all above, then you know what you’re in for. Most of their co-stars are not so tempting up to the sexy leads, including Melissa Barrera’s underdeveloped anti-heroine team captain.
There is also plenty of gooey blood and rather good looking vampire makeup, fangs in particular. Awareness of the shots is not terrible although some of them are overly edited – several simple shots of action are smartly choreographed but not so highlights as to make good use of camera angles and make whatever was on screen to move up and across.
Curiously, however, this part of the 90-minute genre exercise saddles is extraordinary appealing.
Deep down for what honesty or peace I do – I can’t really get or stay mad at the film “Abigail” Having the film contain this important factor was one of the underlying selling points of this movie. Yes, Matt Bettinelli-Olpin, Tyler Gillett – the helmers of Ready or Not and Scream 5 (or, Radio Silence as they are better known), are all to blame for giving the two-dimensional disillusioned viewer a nice travel poster. The setup is oil standard and the character fulfill no function beyond that.
Hero operative Weir is abducted by a collection of bickering nutcases. They trail her in a hilariously oversized piece of machinery affixed to the bottom of her chauffeur’s vehicle as she leaves for home. A few of them abduct the girl who seems to be about 12 years old and haul her away to some deserted house where they get to know the risks involved in the operation.
Deceitful yet impeccably groomed gang leader Lambert (Giancarlo Esposito) explains to both us and them: don’t use real names, and don’t use cellphones or anything personal – it is simply over 24 hours of childcare for a young daughter who has a very strong urge to pretend that she is the little swan and is dancing around a daycare facility reenacting the “Swan Lake” practice sessions. You know, what you expect, is what you get.
We know so little about everyone, thanks so much in part to this entire scene that Lambert does where he gives the characters Rat Pack names. In this, Durand plays a jolly-but-dim muscle-bro named Peter who wonders what is nice about being nicknamed after different animals. Later, he gets that it is a fleeting reference that brings no sense of strangeness and quickly becomes acquainted with it.
Given that Peter is perhaps the most relatable of the cast in ‘Abigail’ is also in part due to the fact that he is ever so struggling with the boundaries of his characters’ knowledge and abilities, it is understandable.
Then she is joined by a call sheet of tropes, Abigail’s nurse: empathic and sharp eye witness Joey (Melissa Barrera); their annoying and high-subdued chauffer Dean (the late Euphoria star Angus Cloud); strong-silent-ex-military member Rickles (William Catlett).
And of course eventually the team has to care about not only Abigail but a few obvious concerns such as their spoilt and dangerously uninterested in the whole operation chip specialist Sammy (Kathryn Newton) and their rude, inexplicably foreign accented ex-cop First-mate (Stevens).
These lighthearted party game character traits are unsurprisingly insignificant once Abigail receives your handcuffs’ full measure. The house which Abigail’s victims inhabit is a bit more interesting, though it’s pretty much just the Clue house with some extra gothic paint.
Perhaps that is all that is required to make one enjoy watching a screen game cast ticking every box as they attempt to come up with ways of eradicating a “real” vampire. Nothing in particular about the culture comes to my mind that is so unique or entertaining.
It’s rather difficult to feel very excited watching so many good actors try, with hardly any success, to make you wish to care for their characters since that is not the same as making you care about them. All the ingredients and supplementary information presented could have been better utilized and the pacing of the film could have been a little quicker, as what is here is generally just hand holding the audience as the story hops from point to point. There is also more that could have been done with Joey, who at one point, puts a loaded gun at the waist of her tight jeans. I do believe it and I don’t believe it.
“Abigail” might gain its viewers through sheer happenstance and hope regarding the combination of characteristics. It is not poorly constructed, just tired and uncreative. For those who enjoy B-movies on a shoe-string budget and are especially in the mood for a no-stress occasion, Abigail might be up your alley. And this is a problem in itself because there is a chance that Abigail will disappoint some of you in a way – overly advertized, hopelessly lack of advertisement.
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